The Lion King Revisted

Last night, about 10pm, I took Vivi out in the front yard to go to the bathroom. I noticed some odd things, like every motion sensor light was on- which never happens, and Vivi would not focus- she kept searching and smelling the ground. It was definitely weird, but I didn't pay much attention to it or try and put two and two together- oh that 20/20 hindsight. I kept walking her around the yard, trying to get her to pee so we could go back inside.

There we are standing by the driveway and I hear a noise, the hair on Vivi's back stands straight up. I looked in that direction, and a dog appears coming around one side of the car. We start to back up and the dog starts snarling and running towards us. I stopped moving and so did the dog. Very carefully I start inching us towards the porch, and that's when I see it... another dog slowly walking towards us from the other side of my car.

I would like to preface this, before I continue on, that I have nothing against pit bulls, I like them. Every one that I have ever met has been sweet, loyal, and submissive. It didn't matter to me that these dogs were both pit bulls, the problem was that they had trapped us, chased us, and were snarling and growling. Remember that scene in The Lion King, where the hyenas come out and trap Simba and Nala? That's what it reminded me of, as I quickly tried to calculate whether or not we could make it onto the porch before the dogs caught us.

I attempted to calm the dogs down, speaking to them in a calm friendly tone, but that didn't work. I told the dogs to "Go Home!" in my most authoritarian voice, but that didn't work. And every time I moved they came at us with alarming speed. It was was of the scariest moments of my life- definitely in the Top 5.

This standoff had been going on for about a minute when I decided that we would make a run for the porch, which was about 20 feet away (the dogs were about 3-4 feet from us). I had a treat in my pocket, for when Vivi went to the bathroom, I showed it to the dogs and then threw it as far as I could. When they both started going after it, I ran - dragging Vivi- to the screened in porch. Of course they realized it was a trick, forgot about the treat, and came darting us barking, teeth baring, and growling. I was able to shut the door, just as the first dog started climbing the steps.

I honestly thought they were going to break through the screen, as they stood there trying their best to get on the porch. We went inside the house and breathed a LONG sigh of relief and a quick prayer of thanks. I looked out the window and they were still there, ferociously snarling. After about 10 minutes they gave up and went about peeing on every inch of my yard and then finally left. I don't know who they belong to, obviously a neighbor, but I've never seen them before.

What scared me the most about the entire situation was the what ifs. What if it had been in the afternoon and Spencer was playing in the backyard? What if I hadn't had a treat in my pocket? What if we had been further from the porch?

Today I am just grateful that nothing bad happened and no one was hurt. Tomorrow I'm going to hunt down my irresponsible neighbor!

My Skin is Crawling

EWWWWW! I HATE, loathe, despise, etc., spiders. I don't want to sound all girlie girl, because I can handle some insects, they don't put me into freeze- want to call my dad so he can come and kill it- mode.

About 5 minutes ago I saw a spider, and not just any spider, a cricket spider! I was going to put up a picture of them, but they are so disgusting looking, I don't want it on here looking at me (or you) with it's beady little eyes. Do a Google image search, you'll see what I'm talking about. The thing that makes them so bad, is that they jump- leap is more of an accurate description, long and high.

So I saw the beast, standing between me and the bathroom, and of course I froze, afraid if I moved, it would get away and then come kill me in the night. When I decided to use my shoe, I went in for the kill, and it started jumping all around, so of course I started screaming (thank goodness Spencer didn't wake up!) That's when I got the genius idea to use the vacuum, and I sucked it right up! The kiddo slept through the whole thing.

Feeling rather proud of myself, I sat down on the sofa, still too afraid to go to the bathroom. All of a sudden I heard this weird noise and I jumped up and did a whole body shake to make sure there were no bugs or spiders on me. But the noise was coming from the vacuum! I got a little closer, not too close- to be sure, and listened. I heard it again.

LIGHT BULB!

The cricket spider is alive and jumping around inside of my vacuum. I keep saying that to myself, over and over in a very calm voice, as if that will make it all better. The cricket spider is alive and jumping around inside of my vacuum.

Right now I'm as jumpy as a two year old in a bouncy castle! I keep thinking that there are bugs crawling all over me and paranoia has now taken over. [Insert body shudder] As soon as I finish this up, I'm doing a floor to ceiling house check for any other potential living things that might have taken up residence in my house. What a way to spend a Saturday night!

P.S. I wasn't always afraid of spiders, ironically, my fear went from 0% to about 97% after I watched Arachnophobia. It was one of the those rare times when I was able to convince my parents to let me watch a PG-13 movie when I was 11; and I have never been the same since. If you've never seen the movie, don't watch it, and if you have, then you probably know what I mean.